DREAM 1:
"Iron 
To see iron metal in your dream symbolizes harshness, anger, aggression, ruthlessness, and conflict. On a positive note, it may signify strength, endurance, and willpower.

Darkroom 
To dream that you are in a darkroom suggests that you are waiting for something to happen. You are curious to see what might develop in a situation.

Navy Blue 
Navy blue represents conformity and a lack of individuality. "


DREAM 2:
"Hospital 
To see or dream that you are in a hospital symbolizes your need to heal or improve your physical or mental health. You need to get back to the flow of everyday life. 
Injury 
To dream that you are injured suggests that you need to work on healing old wounds and hurts. You need to stop and slow down. Consider where or how you were injured for further significance."

Eating Habits Living Situation Uncomfortable Appearance

My dream had three main subjects, each of which was lying beneath a very thin vaneer.

The first of three parts was the trail mix. My boss had packed me unhealthy snacks, which I felt somewhat obligated to eat, due to their melting in the sun. I guiltily ate handfuls of chocolate covered almonds, until I was soon sneaking them in a bedroom with children, like a child (which gets into my second part).

I was resentfully attempting to determine where it was I would be leaving, and with whom. I asked him a series of questions he refused to answer, "How many bedrooms should the apartment have?"

The final segment I remember looking into a small full length mirror. Someone was standing next to me (a friend to my right, looking also), and I was admiring a new outfit. I am not certain if I vocalized it, but I was thinking about how this must be what it feels like to want to take a picture of yourself, show off, I hadn't known it before.

Time to Wake Up

"I'm exhausted now

time to wake up"

Admire

"here you will dream of people you admire

exposing your fraudulence"

Alternatively

"Resurrection 
To dream that you or someone is resurrected from the dead suggests that you will eventually overcome your current obstacles to achieve your goals. It signals an awakening of your spirituality and renewed energy. Alternatively, the dream indicates that the same old problems are coming back to haunt you because they were not properly addressed or dealt with in the first place."



"Hands 
To dream of your hands represent your relationships with those around you and how you connect with the world. Hands serve as a form of communication and can represent authority, hate, protection, justice, etc depending on the gesture. Perhaps you need to lend a helping hand to someone. If someone else is giving you a helping hand, then it implies your need for help. Do not be afraid to ask for assistance or to depend on others from time to time. Moreover, the left hand symbolizes your graciousness and your feminine, receptive qualities, while the right hand symbolizes the masculine and active attributes. The right hand may also be a pun for some decision or something being "right". If you dream that your hands are detached or see disembodied hands, then it indicates that you are not getting your point of view across. You are not being understood or someone is not understanding you. The dream may also symbolize feelings of loneliness. If you see disembodied baby hands in your dream, then it points to your maternal eagerness or your desires to feel needed.

To dream that you are holding hands with someone represent love, affection and your connection with that person. Your dream may also reflect anxieties about losing touch with him/her or that you are drifting apart."

Fever Dream

I am not going to retell this entire dream, only what I took from it. First, I should start by saying that I fell asleep, and was dreaming in my dream, an intricate one, with a complex storyline that involved the beach. The dream ended with sand in my nose, I was trying to get it out for several minutes, but could not. You and our friend woke me up, I was in this room on this bed, but curled up towards the bottom. I recall being in a very deep sleep, and thinking that when I looked up at you, remembering that we had plans. I was embarrassed, and very much wished that I had not slept so late. I looked up at the clock, it was 1:47pm. I told you both about my dream, and how long I tried to get rid of all that sand. The rest of the dream was stupid, and I stayed in bed. Your small hand was on my upper stomach next to mine. Our friends exited the room, and then you did too. I felt far from you, and quietly sort of desperate. The strangest part was looking down at your hand, it remained there, warm, still, and small. I wondered how you did that. I could hear you all in the other room, but could not myself move. Needing you, and caring for you, I figured I would err on doing what I very much wanted to, and I laced our fingers, but you did back, this made me happy. I wondered about your arm being attached. But was thankful. 

Sam opened my door, and I awoke, for the second time, in the same spot I was dreaming. I could feel each layer of how far deep I was, and came to bemused. "Are you still alive?"

All Of This Water

Self acceptance.

"Drowning 
To dream that you are drowning indicates that you are feeling overwhelmed by emotions. Repressed issues may be coming back to haunt you. You may be proceeding too quickly in trying to discover your subconscious thoughts. You should proceed more cautiously and slowly. If you drown to death, then is refers to an emotional rebirth. If your survive the drowning, then it means that a waking relationship or situation will ultimately survive the turmoil.

To see someone drowning in your dream suggests that you are becoming too deeply involved in something that is beyond your control. Alternatively, it represents a sense of loss in your own identity. You are unable to differentiate who you are anymore.

To dream that you rescue someone from drowning indicates that you have successfully acknowledged certain emotions and characteristics that is symbolized by the drowning victim. If you fail to make the rescue, then it implies that you are numb from fear. Consider a situation in your waking life where you are letting fear dictate your actions.

Sinking 
To dream that you or something is sinking suggests that you are feeling overwhelmed. Someone or something is pulling your down. You may be experiencing low self-esteem and confidence. Alternatively, the dream means that some important and significant stage in your life may be coming to an end. Consider what is sinking and its significance."

Everyone Too Big To Swallow

dear self,
you listen too well, you think you understand everything
even when you think you don't
and the only thing you've been good at
is keeping the waterworks in your eyes
and waiting
for things to work out by leaving you behind


nobody wants to be loved that much
when I am feeling hallow
slid you in to a cookie cuter shape of something
I cannot swallow
that suffocated feeling by the look in my eyes
when you say you are going to go
no one even consciously knows


well I found my closure I suppose
and no regrets, although
in my dreams you're still throwing your ice water
down the back of my neck

Two Dreams

The two dreams I chose to interpret upon waking:
1. I am in this bathroom, my toothbrush along with other belongings are missing, I find only one that is not my usual toothbrush, and find some toothpaste. All that I care about it brushing my teeth. I put the toothpaste on, not knowing whose toothbrush it is until right before I use it. I realized who it belongs to, use it anyway, then find my toothbrush.
2. I am at dinner with someone and their mom, we sit very close and I am in the middle, the meal is served. It is announced that it is steak and lobster something, I say nothing, they gracefully take theirs from the serving plates, after a moment I go to do the same. I have just a fork in my left hand, nothing in my right, we continue to all converse but I cannot get my food off of the plate. The meal begins to fall apart a bit, I am embarrassed but play coy, the person notices my struggle so I say that I should have used a knife also, I keep trying, until the person goes to help me. Neither of us can transfer the food to the plate in front of me and my meal falls apart completely into a mush. 


1.
"Teeth 
To dream that you are brushing your teeth refers to your level of confidence, your struggles and your aggressiveness. You need to look out for yourself and your own interest. Perhaps, you feel that your position is shaky.
Toothbrush 
To see or use a toothbrush in your dream suggests that you are feeling defensive about any criticism directed towards you. You are putting up a shield or barrier to protect yourself from potential hurt. Alternatively, the dream means that you are preoccupied with your appearance and are worried about how others perceive you.
Toothpaste 
You are expressing concerns about your appearance."


2.
"Dinner
To dream that you are eating dinner with others signifies your acceptance or others. It is a time to reflect and share past experiences. It also suggests that you see everyone as an equal.
To dream that you are a guest at a dinner party signifies enjoyable pleasures with close friends.
Meals
To see meals in your dream suggest that you are dwelling too much on trivial matters, causing your attention to be diverted from important issues. Alternatively, you may be lacking spiritual enrichment and sensual expression."


1. Wanting to improve confidence and/or how I see myself, my struggle with aggressiveness, having no tool. I wish to shield myself from others, with my low confidence, self worth, and protective barrier. I am very much occupied with how other's see me, not how I see myself, therefore using someone's toothbrush who I put the most stock in regarding my appearance and worth. 


2. I have a faux acceptance from others, especially those I sat down to have the meal with, my thoughts are very much stifled, not sharing past experiences with the desire to. In the beginner I find us equals, but very quickly find out the truth of the matter, wanting to share enjoyable pleasures but being honestly incapable of it. Trivial matters fall apart, it takes my entire attention and focus. I disable myself with the way that I am, with sharing enrichment and expression, no one can assist, despite efforts, and I was unable to eat the prepared meal and everything it symbolized in the first place.

Losing My Mind

I stood at what felt like the top of the world, the city lights glowing below me, distant and beautiful. I felt alive, and full of fresh air, in every way. It wasn't quite two in the morning, and I didn't feel quite conscious. I looked in front of me in awe, I felt the city in every way, and everything it stood for to me. I stood in the present. I begin to walk home, and I knew my way. I also knew the feeling that would seep deep inside me as I got into my bed to sleep. I went down, down, down, until I was under the lights, and inside of the past. I crave familiarity. It's just my dreams are starting to feel like my real life, and everything I am living just isn't. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen or felt, in that moment, because it was clear, unclouded by my memories.


In my dream, my dad sat across from me on a low roof top, at a small circular table. I remember I could feel my hair, thick and wild. Without sharing my ideas with him, on everyone else's life and growth, and my being so ashamed and so sure I was completely unaltered. I didn't say anything, and my dad looked and me stern and said, do not pretend that you are the same person. He said there are so many differences, don't lie and fake that this version is the same as that version here. He said when you go back there you can be you, and that I am myself here as well, just don't pretend that they are the same. Don't act like you haven't changed (and everyone else has grown up). I didn't say anything, and a part of me knew he was right.


In my dream last night I was sitting in the passenger seat of a large van, I think it was white, and was parked in a spot in a parking lot. You sat close to me in the driver's seat and I think we were looking at each other as we conversed. We talked for a while, and I remember being happy that we finally were, like I had been wanting to for a little while. I remember a break in our talking, and then you said easily, "I realized with personalities like ours, that it is impossible for  us to be friends." I couldn't be sad about what you said, because I knew in my heart of heart it to be true. I sat there thinking about how you phrased it, and was almost relieved we both understood the truth of the situation despite it not being at all what I wanted it to be. I also thought about what you meant about personalities like ours, and how you meant that they were different from each other's, not the same. I understood and knew the feeling to be mutual, and it was a fact we could never be friends, I got out of the car, and I'm not sure if you ever did.