1. stop making everything about yourself
2. find somewhere to live
3. work more hours

2013 Movies I've Seen

2013 Movies

Gangster Squad
Zero Dark Thirty
Movie 43 (turned off)
Stoker
Arthur Newman
Paradise
Spring Breakers 
On the Road (turned off)
The Place Beyond the Pines
Room 237
Trance
To the Wonder
Mud
The Great Gatsby
The Stories We Tell
Frances Ha
The Spectacular Now
Before Midnight
Now You See Me
The East
This is the End
The Bling Ring
World War Z
Only God Forgives
Blue Jasmine
Drinking Buddies
The To Do List
Lovelace
Ain't Them Bodies Saints
Touchy Feely
Prisoners
Don Jon
Gravity
Runner Runner
La Vie d'Adele (Blue is the Warmest Color)
Charlie Countryman
her
What Maise Knew
In a World...
Short Term 12
The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
The Wolf of Wallstreet
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty 

to watch:

Struck by Lightning, Mama, Side Effects, Oz: The Great and Powerful, Admission, The Girl, Upstream Color, The Company You Keep, Disconnect, Aftershock, Closed Circuit, Sightseers, The English Teacher, The Kings of Summer, Man of Steel, Byzantium, Laurence Anyways, Stuck in Love, The Canyons, Magic Magic, Prince Avalanche, As I Lay Dying, Fruitvale Station, Crystal Fairy, Girl Most Likely, Salinger, Adore, Thanks for Sharing, C.O.G., A.C.O.D., 12 Years a Slave, Kill Your Darlings, Dallas Buyers Club, Mr. Nobody, Nebraska, Homefront, Sunlight Jr., The Immigrant, Inside Llewyn Davis, The Furnace, American Hustle, Saving Mr. Bank, Labor Day, The Past. Also: Passion, The Happy Sad.

Things I need in order to feel like a person:

1. Dentist visit and retainer
2. Fix the things that I need to about my car
3. Have enough in my bank to where I am not stressed about it

Make Change

1. I am indefinitely changing the way of my blog. It is not just whiny and redundant, but it is nothing more than that. I would love to incorporate prose, and narratives, and practice my writing (as well as sentence structure).
2. My over-eating comes very much from my permeant uneasiness. I wish for anything to soothe me.
3. I love being at home! There is just so much to do, and I like doing all of those things, and I like liking where I am and I like thinking and I like being alone at night and doing everything on my terms and being happy. It is even harder to be everywhere else.
4. It's funny dwelling on going to town this weekend. It is funny because I feel as though I am leaving my real life, and all of the happenings going on here. I don't want to leave my friends, my routines, the farmer's market, karaoke, there is so much to experience. I literally cannot wait to see my brother though, and talking to him today on the phone was so sweet. I asked him if he was busy when I called him, and he not just said that he was going to call me earlier but that he was not. Later I found out that he was out doing things with his friends. I love him so much I can't even talk about it. I would like to lay around with Alex, I'd like to do something funny with Tess, I'd like to talk endless with Jillian. I have no idea how it will go, such a short amount of time, but I think it will be very good for me also to not be here, I hope to miss it.

Normalcy!

11 random things about myself:
1. I'm starting to believe hole in your lip to be more than an expression
2. I admire people who listen to songs on repeat for long amounts of time
3. The warmth of the sun in the morning gives me a glimpse of hope for my day
4. I respect the people in my life, who don't know
5. Happiness for me is when I am conscious of happiness
6. I am ashamed on a daily basis of the things I haven't learned
7. I'm obsessed with compound words
8. I wrote a song in second grade, with a chorus and everything, I spelled chorus wrong at the time
9. One of the first and most important things I watch for is what others watch for
10. I find immense pleasure dwelling on unspoken things
11. A dear friend of mine told me once that when it gets hard he says to himself "just get through the goddamn shift." I think of that when I'm struggling and it helps every time.


11 questions Z asked:
1. My favorite and most prominent is Mollie U. it always makes me happy each time I hear it. I like Moll like when my boss says it by accident (correcting himself each time) and when one person calls me Molls and Mulls.
2. The hardest obstacle I am in the process of overcoming, and realized is the source of all my obstacles (again) this last year, is my mind.
3. "Home" to me is this apartment now. My bed, or with my brother always. Or anywhere with Austin.
4. My favorite food is pineapple pizza. As far as meals just anything familiar or sentimental, South Pine or Sopa.
5. My favorite place to run away to. A movie theater came to mind, but sleep more honestly. (Glee, the most honestly.)
6. I don't take for granted, but seemingly similar is how I act towards those I love in my life and my family. I wish to improve that.
7. Very earliest is a view from the street in Nevato. Then a white fence from a car.
8. Painfully a lefty.
9. Sleeping sockless is one of the most treacherous and uncomfortable things I have ever endured
10. Definitely very sunny, but not through my blinds or curtain. But warmish.
11. Quaint was definitely first.


11 questions for people who also like answering questions:
1. When you think of smiles who/what comes to mind?
2. Absolute favorite guilty pleasure?
3. A lyrics, line or quote that describes you (or life) perfectly?
4. First thought when you look in a mirror?
5. The last event that made you grow?
6. How do you tend to sleep?
7. The best word you've heard?
8. The first movie, book or song that changed how you really thought of things?
9. The last four things that you google searched?
10. Something that will never not make you laugh? (you can't say double negatives)
11. A time you would go back to if you could tweak or alter your words, actions, thoughts, or choices?

In Order (Favorite Movies List)

FAVORITE MOVIES OF ALL TIME

1. wicker park 
2. science of sleep
3. moulin rouge
4. fight club
5. eternal sunshine of the spotless mind
6. donnie darko
7. the illusionist
8. a single man
9. closer
10. inception
11. new moon
12. blue valentine
13. garden state
14. seven pounds
15. forgetting sarah marshall
16. signs
17. the village
18. the kids are all right
19. v for vendetta
20. vanilla sky
21. mr. and mrs. smith
22. the curious case of benjamin button
23. scott pilgrim vs. the world
24. the strangers
25. brokeback mountain
26. never let me go
27. 8 mile
28. spice world
29. josie and the pussycats
30. mean girls
31. zoolander
32. the greatest
33. brothers
34. the shining
35. titanic
36. the reader
37. youth in revolt
38. twilight
39. sucker punch
40. the town

HONORABLE MENTION:
jennifer's body

500 days of summer
scary movie 3
wedding crashers

i'm still here

life or something like it

elizabethtown

juno

little miss sunshine

chloe
kick-ass

Could Be Better, Could Be Worse

1. forgetting dryer lint in the dryer screen
2. coming in and out the front door at odd hours
3. driving too fast on the private road
4. not flushing every time i pee
5. not standing drinks up straight in the fridge
6. leaving the front door open briefly while the a.c. is on

Stress List

1. $1,200 and increasing car bill
2. geography grade that is likely to be a D
3. moving out and rent
4. summer - clothes, money, river, friends, plans, school, boyfriend
5. school - transfering, units, classes, homework, grades

Facts

I admire people who make goals and do little things modestly and secretly for themselves, and I sometimes think that I do those things just so that I can like that about myself.
I am left-handed but have been told on more than one occasion that I'd most likely write neater with my right.
I don't like to like things that other people like that they like, like the smell of gasoline. 
If I had to get one tattoo this moment it would say "Life Is Easy" and he on my hand, it would be a sort of punishment for taking my life too seriously. 
I sometimes see how long I can go without communicating with someone, mostly to see when they will try to talk to me, but even more than that I am disciplining myself for wanting to talk to them so badly.
I honestly do think my life would make an entertaining movie, if done correctly.
I am lactose intolerant, but no one seems to believe me.
I like to think that I would rather be uncomfortable in a situation than the other person, but I also think that is because I would be uncomfortable if I thought at all that they were. 
I day dream about turning off my cellphone, and dream at night about text messaging.
Every day I work towards bettering myself, eliminating flaws, and growing mentally and emotionally, but mainly I just go to school and work.
I think about crashing every single time I am driving or a passenger in a car, sometimes accidentally. 
I take great pleasure in small acts of anarchy and defiance, though it involves for the most part just eating out of grocery store bins.
I find that changing others' lives is the most significant thing a person can do, and a part of me will always want to be famous.

Movies

To Buy:

• Closer
• Fight Club
• Mean Girls
• Time Traveler's Wife
• Yes Man
• The Incredibles

Christmas List

mostly for myself

1. Garden State movie

2. Book light for my bed

3. New bed (mattress or frame)

4. Subway gift card

5. 500 Days of Summer ( Amazon pre-order)
   
6. Coffee maker of some sort

       7. Suede Navy Puma Speed Cats (size W9)

ListFUL Mood

What I Live for Would Be:

peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, when people call/text me right after we just spent time together, watching the sunrise, being under a big blanket, my favorite movies, my MUSIC, spending hours on the phone, letters, holding hands, driving (living) in socks, genuine smiles when they're unexpected, when people subtly do little things they know that I like, pineapple on pizza or sandwiches, modesty, when someone says they miss me when I saw them recently, really cold water, falling asleep with someone, when people use the word "perfect" and mean it, the hottest showers possible, the feeling of complete relief, avocado,  the phrase "of course", being home completely alone for long periods of time, when someone asks me what a word I used means, long hugs, when things remind people of me, hand massages, seeing best friends who adore each other, facial scars, getting things for free, duets, perfect weather, quotes, people who have my phone number memorized, waking up to someone, alphabetical and chronological order, real friendship, when people ask me questions, lyrics, purple and green together, knowing secrets, making someone food, plays-on-words, old pictures, fresh air, compound words, large amounts of snow, when someone is walking away but looks back again, driving under an overpass in the pouring rain,

What Kills Me:

listening to people eat bananas, the smell (and feel) of sunscreen, when people talk about how much they like sex, when I know someone isn't thinking about me, things scraping metal (teeth on metal spoons), feeling a lack of privacy, regretting eating something, arrogance, puking/puke, waiting for something that never happens, school, watching or thinking about someone I love crying, feeling under appreciated, knowing a friendship faded or is fading, hearing someone barfing, when people describe things as 'awkward', long/dirty finger nails, when time goes by quickly, hair, luke warm shower water, waking up sweaty, dogs, watching movies with light(s) on, hearing gagging, feelings scared in water, the words "nipple" and "horny", MATHEMATICS, tongue piercings, when people drink something with food in their mouth, feeling overwhelmed, guns, going to social events alone, when someone is mean to me without a reason, television, hand/finger prints on glass, toilets with weak water pressure, being ignored, whispers, waking up tired, important things being erased or broken, my hands being dirty, someone knowing i strongly dislike something and they do it anyway,

Stupid

I am secretive, I am selfish, I am shy, I am selective, I am stoppable, I am sleepless, I am scared, I am strayed, I am sentimental, I am spoken for, I am soulful, I am self-critical, I am secluded, I am stuck, I am seduced, I am stimulated, I am shaken, I am sedated, I am shameful, I am strained, I am a success, I am staying.