An Exceptionally Introspective Shower

One slip of the finger, I swear to god.

I knew, I knew all along, the rules put in place, regulations and restrictions set to motion. Not one sip of alcohol, not one. No bread or carbs of any kind unless eating out with friends. Do not kiss a girl, not once. I allowed myself to think of any sort of thing I pleased, I was never really one for reality. This is not to say that I was a daydreamy type, head in the clouds, just that I was unimpressed on a day to day basis. Blame it on movies, music, society's need to romanticize and embellish all things, but it was there, always was. I knew what AA was before I knew what college was, I was severely aware addiction ran in my veins like blood, and every moment was the brink of collapse. I was so self aware. Losing yourself is so cliché, where did I go? with no means to retrieve my "self"? Something somewhere got the best of me, a night, a person, a single word, my hand on the wheel took the wrong turn, the road I have been pointing towards the whole time, perhaps nothing happened at all.