I'm aware not much has really changed, except gained and lost a friend
but I would do anything to get back to where I was and who I was back then
I kept my word, used them wisely, and you knew you could trust me
I knew who I was, cared for that person, and looking at my reflection didn't altogether crush me
If I could do anything to feel what it felt like in my chest to hold your hand
I would try my hardest, do my best, and fake that it would all be worth the chance
that I'd lose another part of me, the bits and pieces that I got left
and remember to say only what I hope to be, state only the present and neglect the rest


I'm aware now I can never be confident in finding pleasure in my reactions, without the concern they'll be forced
but I will face my horizon, for the past is a slippery slope and memory lane has only lead me farther off course


I just recall all those days and nights, sweet and pure, my entire heart so intact
now I try to make times just their own, only for my laugh to ring with a dishonest crack
give me my delight, contentment, and outlook back
left the better parts of me in the letters, on each appreciative note
with the burning of that parchment, the flames licked my innocence and left my virtue revoked
I try to contact the better me, but it won't so much as touch base
comprehending now what you see, it's agonizing attempting not to hide this face
from each person round here who effortlessly stole my breath
you took much more, leaving me unable to so much as rest
and for that I can't bring those thoughts with me, I'll endeavor to start fresh


how could I ever desire anyone to obtain the components of me you still know?
that dismal notion I would not even want another to voice I linger on their pillow
it is a rather upsetting amount, that I wouldn't want you to convey but rather recount
said person would have to prove it, not merely concur
that nothing is who you are, you are only who you once were


we parted, walking side my side, in opposing directions, I was mindful our regrets still coincide
if you believe your most tremendous mistake was every feeling and account you failed to hide


yeah you cut me open, and with overuse, your blade was blunt
right where the heart is, i didn't get stabbed in the back but ripped from the front
proceeding, I incorrectly assumed that it would become something that all could see
but everyone is aware nothing has changed, and this is an impression only discernible to me