Fucked Up

I looked down at my right arm and saw my MY claw marks. I laid in the shower shaking, thinking about death for more than an hour. Twisted up in bed churning my legs, falling ugly and limp to the floor, begging god in a weak desperate whisper. I attempted to think of a comparable pain, nothing came to mind. So I knelt on my knees, writhing, waiting it out, so I could get dressed for work.