a woman has been screaming about her man texting erica for a very long time, seemingly somewhere in the hallway
I've convinced myself I have lost my mind
like an extraordinarily religious person, only hyper-self aware of my variance from normal society and its perspective
I see everything in such a certain way
like a superhero who was poisoned but now views the world as energy, instead of objects
I relate to no one, on my spiritual path and level
I spent 70 dollars on groceries, and decide not to eat them
I swallow broken up sleeping pills, and drink cough syrup without the cough stuff in it
it is december now
I will sequester myself away for the entirety of the year
and hope I will come out better for it
in that sense
today was inspirational
like a fresh start, a new chance
I woke up slightly nauseous and very dizzy
that song came on the radio, and I remembered I wanted to die
"gonna use my arms
gonna use my legs
gonna use my style
gonna use my sidestep
gonna use my fingers
gonna use my, my, my imagination
'cause I gonna make you see
there's nobody else here
no one like me
I'm special so special
I gotta have some of your attention
give it to me"
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