Quarantine

i can't do anything i want
i can't go to school, can't talk to lizz

can't speak with anyone I actually want to
i can't stop spending money, or being angry with everyone

I haven't slept in two nights

I haven't taken sleeping pills in two nights

aside from melatonin last night

it only lasts two hours

I have to choose them wisely

I slept from 230 until 430

wasn't the smartest..

I've been a bit clouded

I've been very lost 

my mom glances up at me

over a table all bread and eggs

her expression is entertained by my endless eating

but bored by my bottomless depression 

"so," she says after a pause neither of us really wanted to fill "are you lonely?"