I Want To Share When I Am Happy, Loving Or Loved

It's been weeks and weeks, but I can say right now that I am in a positive place. I want to tell everyone, and that it a great feeling. I hope that it lasts long enough to keep going with it, use it for hope, and momentum. When I feel good I do not worry so much about how bad my future could turn out, or how much I don't really like myself, or how I wish so much good for all my loved ones who might not be getting it.
I get so insanely humiliated when I am having a hard time, especially struggling with being so sad, like I was, and probably always will be. I do apologize for mostly really only going to writing when I am the most down, I promise myself I will alter that (there is a lot of greatness still left).
And if my hands are fists, I am not fighting, I am just trying to hold on.